An Apple a Day

I have a hard time controlling myself. I struggle with self-discipline.

Self-discipline or self-control as it’s called in Galatians 5:23 is a fruit of the Spirit. It’s listed right there along with love, joy, peace patience, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and kindness.  It’s sure a lot easier for me to be kind or love others than to control myself. 

One of my flaws and areas that I lack discipline, is in what I eat. I eat like a teenager at a slumber party. I used to have an over active thyroid and fast metabolism (before kids and before age happened) and I could eat whatever I wanted and stay thin. So I still eat like a Netflix binge watcher on vacation. It’s a hard habit to break.  

Eating out at lunch one day I went in with the attitude that I was going to eat healthy. Fish and veggies were on the menu. But this place I was eating at has the best onion rings. If you’ve eaten at Cheddars, you know what I mean. I mean, come on! How am I supposed to pass up on those crispy, fried, golden rings?! So...the onion rings won out.

Now, to be fair to myself I do eat healthy occasionally. I have my ups and downs like most people do. After a few days of junk my body craves something healthy. But it’s not as often I should and would want to. The spirit is willing but the stomach and the rest of my flesh is oh so weak.

Paul says this in Romans 7:19-20, "For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it."

This little tongue twister is saying, "I want to do good. I plan on doing good, my spirit wants to do good, but my flesh says nah, have another cookie."

The last part of the verse is what scares me. It's no longer I who do it but the sin LIVING IN ME! The sin is taking over my body like an alien living within me and ready to jump out and control me completely. This goes deeper than onion rings at lunch, this is the sin that we become slaves to. (Romans 6:16).

The sinful nature won out at lunch that one day. The flesh was stronger. I’m like eve tempted to eat the forbidden fruit but instead I’m forbidding myself to eat the nutritious healthy fruit and tempted to eat the forbidden junk food. In this case, the fruit is not forbidden, but encouraged.  

It’s not just food that I lack self control in. I struggle with guilt. I feel guilty about my guilt. Talk about messed up. I feel this is one of those schemes of the devil. He wants us to feel guilty and forget that we have a savior who has removed all of our guilt on the cross. Repentance is enough for Him and he says it’s done. Forgotten. All that is required is a broken and contrite heart. Psalm 51:7

So that’s it. The only two areas that I fail in. Other than that I’m perfect. Ok...so lying may be another area I need to work on. 

These are failures of the flesh. These are my weakness, these are areas that I need to learn some self discipline. Some self control. 

Funny that self-control is listed among the fruits of the Spirit and that it has the word self in it because I can’t do this by myself.  It is a fruit of the Spirit after all. It’s a Spirit with a capital ‘S’. As in Holy Spirit. The Spirit of God living inside me. It’s a fruit produced from having the Holy Spirit grow so strong within me that the spirit is much more willing than my flesh.

For any fruit to grow it has to be nurtured and watered. As a Christian I’ve learned that my desires have changed the closer I’ve gotten to God and have a close relationship with him. My patience has grown due to me allowing the spirit to grow within me. My faithfulness to God has grown due to me nurturing that relationship with God and obeying His word and allowing that fruit to grow. 

But why is this fruit of self control so hard to grasp?  Why is it this constant battles of wills? The spirit vs the flesh?  The flesh wants what it wants but the spirit can be stronger if we pump up our spiritual muscle. 

So what’s the answer? How do I take down the guilt and put down the onion rings?  I think for me I have to harvest one of the other fruits of the Spirt. I have to pluck the fruit of faithfulness. My faith is what makes me strong. My faith is what will win against this battle of the flesh. I have to remain faithful. I have to draw closer to the one who will help me win this battle. Fight the good fight of faith, lay hold on eternal life, to which you were also called and have confessed the good confession in the presence of many witnesses.” 1 Timothy 6:12.

I have to fight with the sword of the spirit which is the word of God (Ephesians 6:17). I can slay the enemy that tries to control me one page at a time, one verse, one chapter, one book of the Bible at a time. One Bible study at a time, one prayer at a time. That faith will grow stronger and bigger and will be able to slay that ole flesh that controls me. I’m sure it will be a constant battle until the day I die, but I know my victory is in Jesus and faith is the victory that overcomes the world. (1 Corinthians 15:57; 1 John 5:4).

In building that righteous character I am bringing glory to God. “May you always be filled with the fruit of your salvation—the righteous character produced in your life by Jesus Christ —for this will bring much glory and praise to God.” Philippians‬ ‭1:11‬ ‬‬

Maybe it’s just one small step at a time, one accomplishment at a time. One time that I say no to myself and yes to the Spirit inside beckoning me to do what’s right and make one more right decision. Maybe I just need to remember the old adage, “an apple a day keeps the doctor away.” Maybe I can accomplish this one fruit at a time. And if sin is too appealing like a bad banana and I slip up😉 (we can’t forget about the rotten fruit), it is ok. We can rest in the forgiving grace of the cross and next time we can just try to choose the spiritual fruit over the rotten.

So tomorrow I pray that I will choose less guilt over bad decisions and try to make wise choices and let God’s forgiveness bring me peace and choose to put down the junk and pick up those spiritually healthy fruits.